[ TELEPHONE RINGS ] Woman: HI, COLLEEN.

YEAH.

YES.

UH, MONDAY SHOULD BE FINE TO COME DOWN TO THE SITE.

2:00 ALL RIGHT?

OKAY, TERRIFIC.

OH, THE MOVE WENT GREAT, THANKS.

YEAH, THEY JUST LEFT.

OH, WE'RE GONNA BE LIVING OUT OF BOXES FOR A WHILE.

Izzy: ANOTHER HELLHOLE.

HOW LONG DO YOU THINK WE'LL STAY THIS TIME?

[ BEEPING ] Men: [ GRUNTING ] Woman: OKAY, THANKS.

SEE YOU MONDAY.

BYE.

Woman: IZZY, COME HELP ME UNPACK.

Izzy: IN A MINUTE.

Men: [ GRUNTING CONTINUES ] [ UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ] [ GUN COCKS ] [ GUN COCKS ] Izzy: [ SNARLS ] HYAH!

[ LAUGHING ] WHAA!

[ CELLPHONE RINGS ] Woman: OKAY, AND WHAT TIME?

YEAH, A LITTLE LATER WOULD BE BETTER.

OKAY, 6:00.

6:00 WOULD BE GREAT.

AND WHO'S COMING?

JUST READ -- READ ME THE WHOLE LIST.

YEAH.

Izzy: MOM?

CAN YOU DRIVE ME TO GET A NEW "SKULL SLAM?"

Woman: OKAY.

I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I HAVE TO SAY IT.

OKAY.

OKAY.

WAIT, JUST HOLD ON.

I USED TO LOVE READING THESE AS A KID.

THAT ONE CAME WITH FREE MAKEUP.

HOW COOL IS THAT?

Izzy: NEW "SKULL SLAM," PLEASE.

Woman: [ SIGHS ] [ MUZAK PLAYING ] Woman: NEXT!

BearBear: OKAY, EX.

LAST CHECK-IN WAS THREE YEARS AGO.

WOW.

YOU'RE GOING ON YOUR NINTH YEAR.

NOT MANY OF US GET TO LAST THAT LONG.

SO, CONGRATULATIONS.

YOU ARE ELIGIBLE FOR RETIREMENT.

ALL YOUR BENEFITS ARE OUTLINED HERE IN THIS FOLDER.

HEY, I UNDERSTAND.

BUT DON'T YOU THINK SHE MIGHT BE GETTING A LITTLE OLD FOR YOU?

UH, WHY DON'T YOU WATCH THIS VIDEO?

Man: SO YOU'VE GROWN ATTACHED TO YOUR HUMAN FRIEND.

IT'S EVERY IMAGINARY FRIEND'S DUTY TO PROVIDE COMPANIONSHIP, ENTERTAINMENT, AND COMFORT IN TIMES OF NEED.

BUT AT A CERTAIN AGE, THE CHILD NEEDS TO FACE LIFE ON THEIR OWN.

IF THE IMAGINARY FRIEND STAYS TOO LONG, THE CHILD WILL BE UNABLE TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE HUMAN WORLD AND THE IMAGINARY, WHICH CAN LEAD TO IRRESPONSIBLE DECISION-MAKING, ALIENATION FROM THEIR HUMAN PEERS, AND EMOTIONAL DISTRESS.

WE HOPE YOU WILL MAKE THE BEST CHOICE FOR YOUR HUMAN FRIEND.

BearBear: LOOK, I CAN TELL YOU REALLY LIKE YOUR KID, BUT WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WHEN SHE STARTS TAKING INTEREST IN OTHER PEOPLE?

JUST THINK IT OVER.

[ SQUEAKING ] [ LASERS BLASTING ] [ GUN CLICKS ] Izzy: HEY!

THAT'S CHEATING!

IT'S OKAY.

COME HERE.

[ GUN COCKS, LASER FIRES ] [ LAUGHS ] [ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ] [ CRACKLING STOPS ] [ SOFT MUSIC PLAYS ] [ SIGHS ] [ LASERS BLASTING ] [ RECORD SCRATCHES ] Woman: NO, GREAT.

THAT'S GREAT NEWS.

OKAY, THANKS.

BYE.

[ SIGHS ] ANYTHING EXCITING HAPPEN TODAY?

I THINK IF YOU MADE FRIENDS WITH SOME KIDS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD, MAYBE YOU'D BE A LITTLE LESS... LONELY.

Izzy: [ SLAMS TABLE ] [ BIRDS CHIRPING ] [ DING! ]

[ PIANO NOTES TINKLE ] Izzy: HOW?

Young woman: POPULAR GIRL PRESENTS HOW TO LURE YOUR MAN AND KEEP HIM.

STEP ONE, THE LOOK.

PLAY UP YOUR EYES AND LIPS.

BOYS LOVE THAT.

[ TING! ]

STEP TWO -- TOPICS.

ALWAYS HAVE SOMETHING INTERESTING TO TALK ABOUT.

STEP THREE -- USE YOUR HOT BOD.

SHOW SOME CLEAVAGE TO REALLY DRIVE HIM WILD.

STEP FOUR, BE CONFIDENT AND ALOOF -- SMART, BUT DON'T MAKE HIM FEEL DUMB.

SEXY, BUT NOT TOO SEXY.

Izzy: YOU SURE IT WILL WORK?

Young woman: NOW, GO GET YOUR MAN!

[ TIRES SCREECH ] Izzy: HEY.

Young man: UH, HEY.

Izzy: DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE LADY WHO JUST GAVE BIRTH TO A PIG AND A GOAT IN ARIZONA?

Young man: NO.

Izzy: WHAT ARE YOU READING?

Young man: UM...

UH, "DEATH KNIGHTS."

Izzy: OH.

HAVE YOU READ THE ONE WITH LORD MELTFACE?

Young man: YEAH, ONLY LIKE A MILLION TIMES.

UM... D-DO YOU WANT TO READ ONE?

Izzy: YEAH.

Ex: [ WHISTLING ] Izzy: I MEAN, NO.

SURE.

WHATEVER.

THIS IS THE FIRST EDITION WHEN DEATH HANDS MEETS HIS MOM.

Young man: OH, YEAH, IT TOOK ME SIX MONTHS TO TRACK IT DOWN.

Izzy: COOL.

Young man: I'M GONNA GO GRAB A SODA.

UH, DO YOU WANT ONE?

Izzy: UM, SURE.

[ PIANO NOTES TINKLE ] I THINK IT'S NOT GOING TERRIBLE.

[ WOLF WHISTLE, WOMAN MOANS ] I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT.

DON'T YOU THINK THAT'S A LITTLE WEIRD?

[ ANIMAL ROARS ] OKAY, FINE.

I'LL TELL HIM WHEN HE GETS BACK.

Young man: WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO?

Izzy: UM, NO ONE.

I-I WASN'T TALKING.

Young man: I HEARD YOU.

Izzy: I-I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

Young man: JUST THEN -- YOU LOOKED AT SOMETHING.

Izzy: NO!

I DIDN'T.

Young man: Y-YOU KNOW, I JUST REMEMBERED, I-I GOT TO GO, UM -- I GOT TO GO HELP MY DAD MOW THE LAWN.

BACKYARD, SORRY.

Izzy: I THINK I JUST NEED TO BE ALONE RIGHT NOW.

PLEASE.

[ FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING ] [ INDISTINCT CHATTER ] BearBear: HEY, EX, CARE TO JOIN ME?

WELL, YOU LOOK LIKE YOU NEED SOMETHING STRONG.

BARTENDER!

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?

OH.

YEAH, BEEN THERE.

LET ME SHOW YOU SOMETHING.

[ SAD MUSIC PLAYS ] THIS IS BEN.

WE HAD A COUPLE OF REALLY GREAT YEARS TOGETHER.

THEN, ALL OF A SUDDEN, HE STARTED PLAYING WITH OTHER KIDS.

WHEN BEN GOT INVITED TO HIS FIRST SLEEPOVER, HE BEGGED ME TO STAY HOME, BUT I WOULDN'T.

HE IGNORED ME ALL NIGHT, AND I GOT MAD.

WE GOT INTO A BIG FIGHT IN FRONT OF HIS FRIENDS, AND THEN THEY THOUGHT HE WAS A WEIRDO AND SENT HIM HOME.

WHEN WE GOT BACK, HE TOLD ME HE HATED ME, AND THAT WAS THE LAST TIME I SAW HIM.

I NEVER EVEN GOT A CHANCE TO SAY GOODBYE.

[ FUNKY MUSIC RESUMES ] [ SLURPING ] Izzy: [ SNORING ] [ TOY SQUEAKING ] [ SQUEAKING STOPS ] [ AIR HISSING ] [ CRACKLING ] Izzy: [ COUGHS ] HI.

WHAT'S THIS?

[ SCREAMING ] [ ARTILLERY WHISTLING ] WHAT'S NEXT?

LET'S GO HOME.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

HEY.

Young man: UH, HEY.

GOT ANY NEW WEIRD NEWS TO TELL ME?

Izzy: YEAH.

SORRY ABOUT THAT.

PEOPLE SAY STUPID THINGS WHEN THEY'RE NERVOUS.

Young man: UM, I JUST GOT THE NEW "EXPLODING BOAT."

[ BOTH CHUCKLE ] Young man: HEY.

[ INDISTINCT CHATTER ] YES, I JUST GOT IT THE OTHER DAY.

[ DREAMY MUSIC PLAYS ] </P> </SYNC> </Body>